My phone is doing this thing. I can like but I can't always comment. Sometimes the screen gets stuck but if I work with it and come back it welcomes my touch. There's a line of sensitivity that won't respond at all like I think it should. Sometimes I find if off but a press of the button and it's feeling fine. But I know it's quirks. We're getting along and we have the history and moment to take our time. (I just discovered that I don't have a picture of my phone. Who does?)
Saturday, September 07, 2013
Thursday, February 02, 2012
Gratitude for the Light
I am thankful for this moment for no matter how dark as it may be I am reminded of how grateful that I am for the perspective that gives me even more appreciation for the light. In the last week tragedy has touched my community, family, friends and neighbors. Three incidents that would be considered ‘circumstantial’ should I be so naïve to believe that their relation and the subsequent realization of my gratitude were not impacted enough to drive me to share this realization with you.
I begin with family for that is where I will also end. My brother-in-law, Thomas had only narrowly escaped the tragic accident caused by a brush fire and foggy conditions with negligible visibility on 441 just outside of town. He escaped so narrowly that the glass from a bus colliding into a tractor trailer was showered into the bed of his truck as he steered to dodge yet another collision. His truck and person were remarkably unscathed. His friends who were in a vehicle behind him were hospitalized but not severly injured and their vehicle was totaled. There were 11 people that lost their lives in that accident and some 20+ were hospitalized.
Across the street on the following day my neighbor did not wake from his sleep. His body had been in a slow shut down as the last stages of cancer ate away his vitality and graciously let him pass peacefully on his favorite chair as his life friend and roommate stayed with him in company. I can’t see this as a tragic event. Cancer is a difficult death and his passing was as peaceful as it could possibly have been. He had time to reflect and come to terms to prepare for the next stage of existence whatever it may be. I wish him the best and my heart goes out to my neighbor for the loss of the physical body he had known as the home base for his friend.
A close friend learned yesterday that her grandmother had been hospitalized and is now recovering from a stroke. My friend told me that her left side is paralyzed and she will no longer be as remembered from memories of the past. We seldom are as we are remembered in memories, Love. This does not mean she has lost anything that has made her who she is. She’s still strong, still aware. She’s just having a few communication issues with her body at the moment. It was a scary moment and there are some difficulties to work out. But, she’s still here and there’s still time to make even more memories.
In these few days I have taken a survey of my own blessings. I’m determined to be grateful for every moment I have with my family and friends. I’m grateful for my health and the health of those around me. I offer that which I can spare to lending moments of happiness to share as often as I can. I choose to see this moment as a reminder that every moment should be treasured for what it offers, hope. As long as we’re paying attention, we have a chance to learn to live.
I begin with family for that is where I will also end. My brother-in-law, Thomas had only narrowly escaped the tragic accident caused by a brush fire and foggy conditions with negligible visibility on 441 just outside of town. He escaped so narrowly that the glass from a bus colliding into a tractor trailer was showered into the bed of his truck as he steered to dodge yet another collision. His truck and person were remarkably unscathed. His friends who were in a vehicle behind him were hospitalized but not severly injured and their vehicle was totaled. There were 11 people that lost their lives in that accident and some 20+ were hospitalized.
Across the street on the following day my neighbor did not wake from his sleep. His body had been in a slow shut down as the last stages of cancer ate away his vitality and graciously let him pass peacefully on his favorite chair as his life friend and roommate stayed with him in company. I can’t see this as a tragic event. Cancer is a difficult death and his passing was as peaceful as it could possibly have been. He had time to reflect and come to terms to prepare for the next stage of existence whatever it may be. I wish him the best and my heart goes out to my neighbor for the loss of the physical body he had known as the home base for his friend.
A close friend learned yesterday that her grandmother had been hospitalized and is now recovering from a stroke. My friend told me that her left side is paralyzed and she will no longer be as remembered from memories of the past. We seldom are as we are remembered in memories, Love. This does not mean she has lost anything that has made her who she is. She’s still strong, still aware. She’s just having a few communication issues with her body at the moment. It was a scary moment and there are some difficulties to work out. But, she’s still here and there’s still time to make even more memories.
In these few days I have taken a survey of my own blessings. I’m determined to be grateful for every moment I have with my family and friends. I’m grateful for my health and the health of those around me. I offer that which I can spare to lending moments of happiness to share as often as I can. I choose to see this moment as a reminder that every moment should be treasured for what it offers, hope. As long as we’re paying attention, we have a chance to learn to live.
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
Us vs Them, Changing the face of the 99%
Us versus Them
I've been tossing around the idea of how to integrate new members into the movement. I've come across a few stumbling blocks and rather than proceeding forward with the current plan and watching us lose members and momentum I would like to offer a suggestion.
When asked "What is Occupy about?" We don't have a simple answer. It's hard to encompass everything that occupy is without seeming like a pie-in-the-sky dream. This is a dividing point of an ideal we can not articulate without a lengthy explanation of a subjective perspective on a unrecognizable ideal that hasn't yet been consensed upon.
At Occupy we are a community lending each other information and the means to discuss solutions to the issues of employment, sustainability, environmental alerts of our respective areas. We are the network of our region collaborating in full view of the public eye with an open ear and an inviting twinkle in our eyes. We are a grounding discussion, free of the distractions of race, religion, sex and income. We are a locality self-aware and conscious of our voice in Washington, the Houses, Capitol and City Hall with the ability to agree to fire a voice that speaks for us but does not represent our best interests. Our vested interest is to encourage discussion to find solutions that we can make in a park within the full view of our children because it is their future that our decisions will impact.
I propose we tweak the image of Occupy Gainesville a bit to move forward with the momentum we have and start finding the solutions by identifying and inviting answers to our issues. In order to spread the message of community I ask if we can make a presence as a peaceful discussion group with a sign stating our issue of choice and an invitation to join us. We can Occupy parks or street corners to change the image of the angry protester to a more inviting image of an intellectual discourse geared toward inclusiveness and finding solutions.
I've been tossing around the idea of how to integrate new members into the movement. I've come across a few stumbling blocks and rather than proceeding forward with the current plan and watching us lose members and momentum I would like to offer a suggestion.
When asked "What is Occupy about?" We don't have a simple answer. It's hard to encompass everything that occupy is without seeming like a pie-in-the-sky dream. This is a dividing point of an ideal we can not articulate without a lengthy explanation of a subjective perspective on a unrecognizable ideal that hasn't yet been consensed upon.
At Occupy we are a community lending each other information and the means to discuss solutions to the issues of employment, sustainability, environmental alerts of our respective areas. We are the network of our region collaborating in full view of the public eye with an open ear and an inviting twinkle in our eyes. We are a grounding discussion, free of the distractions of race, religion, sex and income. We are a locality self-aware and conscious of our voice in Washington, the Houses, Capitol and City Hall with the ability to agree to fire a voice that speaks for us but does not represent our best interests. Our vested interest is to encourage discussion to find solutions that we can make in a park within the full view of our children because it is their future that our decisions will impact.
I propose we tweak the image of Occupy Gainesville a bit to move forward with the momentum we have and start finding the solutions by identifying and inviting answers to our issues. In order to spread the message of community I ask if we can make a presence as a peaceful discussion group with a sign stating our issue of choice and an invitation to join us. We can Occupy parks or street corners to change the image of the angry protester to a more inviting image of an intellectual discourse geared toward inclusiveness and finding solutions.
Thursday, October 13, 2011
Democratic Consensus
We're here to claim our voice, our vote. Somewhere in the span of years we've allowed our voices to be hushed as we quietly cast our votes. Our voices unheard and cast aside as we find our politicians ear whispered into by one lobbyist promising favors and spewing gifts and then another lobbyist steps in to take their turn. The representatives of our voices have been put into gilded cages their wings clipped and coddled as they let their ideals become a thing of dreams. The speakers for our voices have been bought and paid for, thank you, move along.
I've tried to explain politics to my children and lobbyists and corporate influence confused them as they asked me how one person can have a bigger vote than the others. Corruption was the only answer that came to mind but they're young and idealistic and already somewhat jaded with the process.
One by one the protesters speak as the circle of nearly strangers from various walks of life introduce themselves with name, preferred pronoun and favorite uncooked food. The nodding of a head in agreement while trying to decide which food is your favorite as the names, pronouns and selections are called out. Hummus, carrots, bananas, "rice and beans","everything they said", and "every kind of fruit.", we smile but time is precious and short. Political ties are cast aside and the group goes about explaining and tweaking a method of communication for peaceful debate of passionate topics. This is a nebulous, organic procedure. It's modified and adapted so that these steps are significant and become more significant and efficient through repetition. A bit tedious but the results are worth the collaboration.
Operating by consensus and committees which are open to join and input we are working toward something we have not known before but it seems attainable. Somewhere between political affiliations, capitalism, progress and the environment we've lost our connection to those in our communities, our environment and in ourselves. We believe that is we secure our influence in the government we can find our way to a consensus of the prosperity of an area as a whole and in doing so we will find a richness that is more fulfilling than monetary wealth can hope to achieve. We feel this is possible because this entire movement has progressed to this point on a global scale superseding religion, political, sexual orientation, race, and class to the pursuit of a greater good based on large group consensus.
It's an awkward process as some of these voices have not been raised before. The bullhorn is handled awkwardly and mostly tentatively and from a distance. They seem unwilling to speak for the whole and conscious of the need to represent everyone who isn't present. Peace is the word here. We're angry and feel the need to vent but there's work to be done. It's a simple request.
The voices of the people, the representatives of the people should be free of corporate bribery. This movement has been one of equality in democracy. Everyone has a vote and all vote are equal. There are no leaders here but there are task directors in lieu of anyone else wanting the responsibility for the position. Choices should be made for the benefit of the community as a whole and not the lining of one's pockets. Taking the voice of the people into account and the area of the community and resources it provides there is a balance and a price to pay an area to maintain.
We deserve the right to know what's happening in our world. Journalism has a responsibility to give us the facts and let us come to our own conclusions. If we wanted someone to placate the masses we'd do so for entertainment. Unbiased coverage of pertinent events not sensational topics to blind us to the ramifications of the actions taken by our country without our knowledge.
Education should be available to all not just to the affluent who can pay for private schools. Educated voices will go the furthest to secure our prosperity and future and the more voices we have the better. It's not because we're jealous of the affluent. We're about doing the right thing. Not just for wealth but for connection with our communities and world. It's about bringing back that feeling of unity with the world around us. It's about Hope.
I've tried to explain politics to my children and lobbyists and corporate influence confused them as they asked me how one person can have a bigger vote than the others. Corruption was the only answer that came to mind but they're young and idealistic and already somewhat jaded with the process.
One by one the protesters speak as the circle of nearly strangers from various walks of life introduce themselves with name, preferred pronoun and favorite uncooked food. The nodding of a head in agreement while trying to decide which food is your favorite as the names, pronouns and selections are called out. Hummus, carrots, bananas, "rice and beans","everything they said", and "every kind of fruit.", we smile but time is precious and short. Political ties are cast aside and the group goes about explaining and tweaking a method of communication for peaceful debate of passionate topics. This is a nebulous, organic procedure. It's modified and adapted so that these steps are significant and become more significant and efficient through repetition. A bit tedious but the results are worth the collaboration.
Operating by consensus and committees which are open to join and input we are working toward something we have not known before but it seems attainable. Somewhere between political affiliations, capitalism, progress and the environment we've lost our connection to those in our communities, our environment and in ourselves. We believe that is we secure our influence in the government we can find our way to a consensus of the prosperity of an area as a whole and in doing so we will find a richness that is more fulfilling than monetary wealth can hope to achieve. We feel this is possible because this entire movement has progressed to this point on a global scale superseding religion, political, sexual orientation, race, and class to the pursuit of a greater good based on large group consensus.
It's an awkward process as some of these voices have not been raised before. The bullhorn is handled awkwardly and mostly tentatively and from a distance. They seem unwilling to speak for the whole and conscious of the need to represent everyone who isn't present. Peace is the word here. We're angry and feel the need to vent but there's work to be done. It's a simple request.
The voices of the people, the representatives of the people should be free of corporate bribery. This movement has been one of equality in democracy. Everyone has a vote and all vote are equal. There are no leaders here but there are task directors in lieu of anyone else wanting the responsibility for the position. Choices should be made for the benefit of the community as a whole and not the lining of one's pockets. Taking the voice of the people into account and the area of the community and resources it provides there is a balance and a price to pay an area to maintain.
We deserve the right to know what's happening in our world. Journalism has a responsibility to give us the facts and let us come to our own conclusions. If we wanted someone to placate the masses we'd do so for entertainment. Unbiased coverage of pertinent events not sensational topics to blind us to the ramifications of the actions taken by our country without our knowledge.
Education should be available to all not just to the affluent who can pay for private schools. Educated voices will go the furthest to secure our prosperity and future and the more voices we have the better. It's not because we're jealous of the affluent. We're about doing the right thing. Not just for wealth but for connection with our communities and world. It's about bringing back that feeling of unity with the world around us. It's about Hope.
Friday, September 16, 2011
Humble beginnings
Beginning in a spark
From waiting disembarck,
Chaos on the wind
Into being, already wins,
From wasting seed,
To growing need,
The raindrops combine
Into life, we find.
From waiting disembarck,
Chaos on the wind
Into being, already wins,
From wasting seed,
To growing need,
The raindrops combine
Into life, we find.
posted from Bloggeroid
Friday, August 05, 2011
Birth Control Pill, not something to think about only once a day
On one hand I'm glad for the recent change in policy to cover birth control pills for women who want them because it means we can cut back on overpopulation. On the other hand the use of birth control pills as a whole frightens me.
Meeting people while you're on the pill skews the pheromone balance of attraction. The pill releases hormones that inhibit pregnancy by making the woman's body feel she is already pregnant. Hormonally she is then finding herself wanting to be by her family and people with similar genetic signatures to her own. Normally our pheromones are attracted to those with dissimilar immune systems and genetic signatures. Due to the similarities of immune system and genetic signatures there is a higher chance of the children resulting from such unions having health issues. This means that the children that will result from such unions will be a result of our manipulating the gene pool of our species. There is a higher chance of infertility in these couples once they do decide to have children.
Not to mention the increase in divorce among those couples that meet under the influence of the pill and go off it to have kids and finding out they are incompatible once the influence is removed.
I'm all for covering birth control, but just hope that the pill isn't started until after there's a relationship based on compatibility on more levels. If someone is too young or ignorant to understand the implications of their decision to find a mate under the influence of the pill they should by all means stay on the pill until they are.
Birth Control Pills Affect Women's Taste in Men: Scientific American
www.scientificamerican.com
http://www.scientificamerican.com/article.cfm?id=birth-control-pills-affect-womens-taste
How synthetic hormones change desire in women--and their choice in a mate
Meeting people while you're on the pill skews the pheromone balance of attraction. The pill releases hormones that inhibit pregnancy by making the woman's body feel she is already pregnant. Hormonally she is then finding herself wanting to be by her family and people with similar genetic signatures to her own. Normally our pheromones are attracted to those with dissimilar immune systems and genetic signatures. Due to the similarities of immune system and genetic signatures there is a higher chance of the children resulting from such unions having health issues. This means that the children that will result from such unions will be a result of our manipulating the gene pool of our species. There is a higher chance of infertility in these couples once they do decide to have children.
Not to mention the increase in divorce among those couples that meet under the influence of the pill and go off it to have kids and finding out they are incompatible once the influence is removed.
I'm all for covering birth control, but just hope that the pill isn't started until after there's a relationship based on compatibility on more levels. If someone is too young or ignorant to understand the implications of their decision to find a mate under the influence of the pill they should by all means stay on the pill until they are.
Birth Control Pills Affect Women's Taste in Men: Scientific American
www.scientificamerican.com
http://www.scientificamerican.com/article.cfm?id=birth-control-pills-affect-womens-taste
How synthetic hormones change desire in women--and their choice in a mate
Thursday, July 07, 2011
I am, Be You
Wrap up in a scene
Draped in a dream
A tapestry of recollection
and resolve,
~I'm here.~
~I feel that.~
~I'm into it.~
Who of us had not longed to be that moment of longing
Of wanting to be,
Unashamed, unstifled, resolutely "Me!"
A testament
To the truth
of You.
I'm glad for it,
Go do it,
Be you.
Draped in a dream
A tapestry of recollection
and resolve,
~I'm here.~
~I feel that.~
~I'm into it.~
Who of us had not longed to be that moment of longing
Of wanting to be,
Unashamed, unstifled, resolutely "Me!"
A testament
To the truth
of You.
I'm glad for it,
Go do it,
Be you.
Tuesday, May 24, 2011
Body of Proof
Stand in uniqueness
Cry in pain
We're all together
Lax/Constrained
Inside that body
There is a cell
Living there
Loving or hell?
Each with choices
When they began
Take what you're given
And give back again
Sudden changes
As the body turns
Lotion moistens
And the Sun can burn
Gentle changes
Each cell decides
Produce poison
Or survive and thrive?
Cry in pain
We're all together
Lax/Constrained
Inside that body
There is a cell
Living there
Loving or hell?
Each with choices
When they began
Take what you're given
And give back again
Sudden changes
As the body turns
Lotion moistens
And the Sun can burn
Gentle changes
Each cell decides
Produce poison
Or survive and thrive?
posted from Bloggeroid
Tuesday, February 22, 2011
The You in You
I see the You that You are,
The You that You can be,
The You that You are trying to come to terms with,
Through trials and bliss,
Silence and speaking,
Accepting You all the same
and hoping for the best,
for You.
The You that You can be,
The You that You are trying to come to terms with,
Through trials and bliss,
Silence and speaking,
Accepting You all the same
and hoping for the best,
for You.
Monday, February 14, 2011
Know Love
Let go.
There are no empty promises here.
I care for you as I do myself and there is no separation,
Support me as I do you and we will be stronger for it, unstoppable.
Let me push you as you push me, up and onward to our goal,
Let me know you as I know me, exploring, growing and there will be peace
as we discover our strengths and weaknesses.
Let me nourish you as I nourish my spirit.
You're a part of me, inexplicably
and because I have been granted something so great
I know that I too am a part of something greater.
We belong,
Let me give back.
Our bodies, a reflection of love not to be taken for granted,
Our minds, capable of learning and processing, reflecting,
Our friends and family our roots of stability and strength when the wind blows hard,
Our universe, a perfect mixing pot of possibility,
Love your self, children, friends, family.
Know love and share it.
-(Happy Valentine's Day to all my friends and family)
There are no empty promises here.
I care for you as I do myself and there is no separation,
Support me as I do you and we will be stronger for it, unstoppable.
Let me push you as you push me, up and onward to our goal,
Let me know you as I know me, exploring, growing and there will be peace
as we discover our strengths and weaknesses.
Let me nourish you as I nourish my spirit.
You're a part of me, inexplicably
and because I have been granted something so great
I know that I too am a part of something greater.
We belong,
Let me give back.
Our bodies, a reflection of love not to be taken for granted,
Our minds, capable of learning and processing, reflecting,
Our friends and family our roots of stability and strength when the wind blows hard,
Our universe, a perfect mixing pot of possibility,
Love your self, children, friends, family.
Know love and share it.
-(Happy Valentine's Day to all my friends and family)
Thursday, February 03, 2011
First Impressions
The first impression is probably the most influence you can have in the relationship and it’s important to be yourself during this conversation. If you can’t be yourself with someone maybe it’s best to find out before the relationship starts. How many relationships have started because of something funny or unique that caught someone’s attention. A lot. Love it or hate it every relationship has a “how we met” moment. We pay the most attention during a first impression and a false impression only burdens you with the expectation of living up to it. Mind your hygiene and be the best “you” that you can be. Always. Not just when you’re on the hunt! I’m not just talking in appearances but also in your habits. Work on improving yourself to meet the highest standards and don’t expect any less. Every day you try is another day closer to your goal even if you mess up a day or two. Respect yourself by being the best you that you can be!
Monday, May 10, 2010
Appendix, tonsils, you wouldn't want them ripped out unnecessarily however should they become malignant we do so, quickly. They are a part of a system, a group of organs, a bundle of tissues, a sheet of cells, cells with individual functions, characteristics, need for resources, reproduction and maladies. Should they prove to be malignant to their host or supporting systems however they are cast aside, perhaps not easily. But we do after all lose our colons, one or both kidneys as well, and we adapt to live without them. Hearts are becoming replaceable, also not easily, but the possibility is there. What is this to you, you ask?
We are the governors of the systems we attend to within our own bodies. We are the president, the king, the supreme monarch of the universe of I. We neither have ultimate control nor do we have a loss of control. We can't help if we have a few cells go rogue. If they go cancerous and spread bad information to other cells and reproduce. We are left doing what clean up work we can to diagnose and treat the disturbance. We can control our exposure to sunlight and the cancerous cells that might be formed through intense radiation or exposure to known harmful circumstances. Sunblock or tan? We do have some options here. We can only do so much to protect ourselves from the hazards around us and those hazards that I am addressing relate only to our governance of our own bodies.
Society is another system though, do we fulfill our functions within our social construct? Do we give more than we receive in terms of positive influence and support? Do we spread negativity and the seeds of malignancy? Individually speaking are we a healthy productive cell, or a cancer? Our awareness is both a blessing and a curse. We're prone to self-defeatist guilt and blame because it is much easier than a subject for our negativity be it through hate or depression. Than it is to find acceptance of our circumstances, responsibility and the determination to change, to adapt. Due to reflection we can change our view to find positive ways to change our social construct both with others and with our own bodies should we choose to do so. Shouldn't we at least aim to find the best "me" that we can be?
To be in a system is to cause to stand in a position to gain or lose because of an action taken or a commitment made to a regularly acting or interdependent group of items which form a unified whole.
We are the governors of the systems we attend to within our own bodies. We are the president, the king, the supreme monarch of the universe of I. We neither have ultimate control nor do we have a loss of control. We can't help if we have a few cells go rogue. If they go cancerous and spread bad information to other cells and reproduce. We are left doing what clean up work we can to diagnose and treat the disturbance. We can control our exposure to sunlight and the cancerous cells that might be formed through intense radiation or exposure to known harmful circumstances. Sunblock or tan? We do have some options here. We can only do so much to protect ourselves from the hazards around us and those hazards that I am addressing relate only to our governance of our own bodies.
Society is another system though, do we fulfill our functions within our social construct? Do we give more than we receive in terms of positive influence and support? Do we spread negativity and the seeds of malignancy? Individually speaking are we a healthy productive cell, or a cancer? Our awareness is both a blessing and a curse. We're prone to self-defeatist guilt and blame because it is much easier than a subject for our negativity be it through hate or depression. Than it is to find acceptance of our circumstances, responsibility and the determination to change, to adapt. Due to reflection we can change our view to find positive ways to change our social construct both with others and with our own bodies should we choose to do so. Shouldn't we at least aim to find the best "me" that we can be?
To be in a system is to cause to stand in a position to gain or lose because of an action taken or a commitment made to a regularly acting or interdependent group of items which form a unified whole.
Thursday, April 22, 2010
On regrets and learning. Who are we?
Who are we? Are we our relations? Most likely we are not. We seldom feel that we can be ourselves with the ones who raised us. We feel the need to play a role in most instances. We are the rebellious child, the cherub, the hero or the accused. We do what we must for demonstrated affection, attention in any combination.
I have made mistakes in my life. I had wished to take back poor choices and actions. I had not only wished to take back the bad choices on my part, but also those of the people around me. It has taken awhile and yet I still have to remind myself to steer the course. I have forgiven. Not only have I forgiven, but I have also taken it into my heart to be thankful of those lessons and the resulting pain and turmoil that those lessons have offered me. There is little time in the present for regret and buried pain of the past.
These lessons have forced me to mold and shape myself. I am a result of my environment and my reactions to my environment. We all are. It is difficult and painful to hurt someone, even unintentionally. We carry with us the burden of doing so and we feel shame or victimized. This shame is often resentment of ourselves and buried rearing its head in our deepest and darkest moments. We have to remember that at some point we have learned from this lesson, positively. There is some light waiting to be discovered in those memories, if not for us than for someone else who was impacted. We have only to have faith in it. Or, if that is too passive, perhaps we should seek it.
Without these experiences, I would have had to wait to grow. The pain was meant to happen. Something had to catch my attention in such a way to make an impact on me long enough for me to reflect and not just respond. Without reflection, these experiences just ricochet within my psyche until the impact has been absorbed. It had to make sense. Logically, what could this mean? How can I learn from this, positively? A negative impact is far too easy and a waste of time to contemplate.
If we find ourselves in a situation far too often we should take the time to reexamine why this is so. We should not blame those around us for our situation we should try to find the strength to trust ourselves to change it. A poor family life is no excuse if we look for a mate who will force us to follow a similar pattern. Are we still trying to fill the role of the dutiful child or the rebellious one? Are we still playing the role of the victim or the accused? If we’re unhappy with our situation perhaps we should try to allow ourselves the role we would wish for ourselves, instead of the one we think we’ve been allotted?
I have made mistakes in my life. I had wished to take back poor choices and actions. I had not only wished to take back the bad choices on my part, but also those of the people around me. It has taken awhile and yet I still have to remind myself to steer the course. I have forgiven. Not only have I forgiven, but I have also taken it into my heart to be thankful of those lessons and the resulting pain and turmoil that those lessons have offered me. There is little time in the present for regret and buried pain of the past.
These lessons have forced me to mold and shape myself. I am a result of my environment and my reactions to my environment. We all are. It is difficult and painful to hurt someone, even unintentionally. We carry with us the burden of doing so and we feel shame or victimized. This shame is often resentment of ourselves and buried rearing its head in our deepest and darkest moments. We have to remember that at some point we have learned from this lesson, positively. There is some light waiting to be discovered in those memories, if not for us than for someone else who was impacted. We have only to have faith in it. Or, if that is too passive, perhaps we should seek it.
Without these experiences, I would have had to wait to grow. The pain was meant to happen. Something had to catch my attention in such a way to make an impact on me long enough for me to reflect and not just respond. Without reflection, these experiences just ricochet within my psyche until the impact has been absorbed. It had to make sense. Logically, what could this mean? How can I learn from this, positively? A negative impact is far too easy and a waste of time to contemplate.
If we find ourselves in a situation far too often we should take the time to reexamine why this is so. We should not blame those around us for our situation we should try to find the strength to trust ourselves to change it. A poor family life is no excuse if we look for a mate who will force us to follow a similar pattern. Are we still trying to fill the role of the dutiful child or the rebellious one? Are we still playing the role of the victim or the accused? If we’re unhappy with our situation perhaps we should try to allow ourselves the role we would wish for ourselves, instead of the one we think we’ve been allotted?
Thursday, April 15, 2010
In planning, in practice
We are here to overcome our obstacles, learn from them, share them for others to learn from our experiences (not to dwell on them in a negative fashion!) and move on. There's time for reflection, but the view is always better looking forward.
Who we are, where we are and how we got here are a result of the experiences we have to experience in order to learn how to improve ourselves while we inhabit this world. We have patterns of thinking that we need to re-examine not only so we can identify malicious ways of thinking but so that we can learn from the choices we make and by doing so strengthen our weaknesses so that we can move on to our next lesson. Our search for ourselves begins with the true acceptance of our faults and our patterns and in doing so, we can find forgiveness.
Our pride shouldn't keep up from sharing the experience with others. If we let our pride keep us from sharing our lessons we cannot contribute to those around us. In sharing the process we are opening ourselves up to further insight for everyone involved. We have people around us who accept us for who we are should we choose to acknowledge them. We're afraid to be ourselves for fear of losing the acceptance that we have, however tenuous.
Who we are, where we are and how we got here are a result of the experiences we have to experience in order to learn how to improve ourselves while we inhabit this world. We have patterns of thinking that we need to re-examine not only so we can identify malicious ways of thinking but so that we can learn from the choices we make and by doing so strengthen our weaknesses so that we can move on to our next lesson. Our search for ourselves begins with the true acceptance of our faults and our patterns and in doing so, we can find forgiveness.
Our pride shouldn't keep up from sharing the experience with others. If we let our pride keep us from sharing our lessons we cannot contribute to those around us. In sharing the process we are opening ourselves up to further insight for everyone involved. We have people around us who accept us for who we are should we choose to acknowledge them. We're afraid to be ourselves for fear of losing the acceptance that we have, however tenuous.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
